Insecure Writer's Support Group

It's that day again!

Wow - how does the first Wednesday in every month come around so quickly?!

Do you ever wish, even just for a moment, that you'd never started this writing lark?

I sometimes look back to days when my evenings and weekends were just filled with... well, ordinary things like reading, cooking, watching tv, the odd bit of housework... and feel a little pang of nostalgia.

I always wanted to be a writer.  I wrote voraciously through my teens, confident that one day it would be my 'proper' job.  However, life doesn't go according to plan, as we all know, and I was 39 before I found myself with (almost!) enough time on my hands to consider giving it a go.  I'd never stopped writing - in my head.  I'd scribble notes on the back of receipts - anything - when out or on holiday and an idea or a line of dialogue struck me; I just never had time to use them.

Now, I am so, so grateful to have had my short stories accepted and published, but the pressure I'm feeling is sometimes so huge I feel the need to hide.  I'm the one applying this pressure, of course, but the stress of finding enough time to write around my day job, of waiting for acceptance or rejection, of wanting to write and having to sit and make small talk with the MiL instead, sometimes makes me feel like tearing my hair out.

I know that I won't give up.  I tried to a couple of years ago and came slinking back to the laptop eventually.   If you're a writer, it's just there, inside you.  Convincing others that you're a writer with something to say that's worth reading is the hard part, and sometimes, with the novel that I want to write but am yet afraid to start looming over me, I wonder if I can really do it.

I've come to the conclusion that it's fine to feel insecure and beaten at times - it's probably much healthier than rolling along on a calm, confident sea and becoming complacent.  There's much further to fall from there!

:)  Linda

Oh Blogger!

Yet again, Blogger won't let me comment on my own blog!

Here are the comments I was trying to add:

Jenny - I'm glad it's not only me who finds Greek hard! I'd love to try a worksheet (or two)  if you find them! ;)

Catherine - I quite often forget I've got a blog and therefore forget to add to it!  So glad to know you like reading it - I'll try harder!  Merci bien!

Sarah - Err... yeah, confession time - I have dyed my whole head before now but don't do it any more (just the roots) as it's so GREY under the dye my hair has gone wiry and out of conditon!  Yikes!

Caitlin - I think you're a lot younger than me so it makes me feel much better to know you don't like being moshed either!

Peggy - who cares about housework, eh? Boring boring boring! We perfectionists have more lofty things to obsess about...

Annalisa - thanks again for the award!

Thank you Annalisa Crawford!

I've been nominated for The Versatile Blogger award (isn't it pretty?) by Annalisa Crawford at Wake up, Eat, Write, Sleep.  Annalisa's a versatile and interesting blogger herself, so check out her blog if you haven't already!

Now, apparently, I have to tell you seven things about myself and then nominate fifteen other blogs (do I even know that many bloggers?!).  I'll do my best...

Ok, get ready to be fascinated:

1.  I colour my roots (let's get that one out of the way)

2.  In my teens I wrote a poem about a middle aged man who picks up a young girl on a bus. She turns     out to be a serial killer and murders him, post-coital.  It all rhymed but unfortunately I can't find it.  Or maybe that's a good thing...

3.  I love Jilly Cooper books and am also a huge fan of Rose Tremain.

4.  The song that makes me go all goose-bumpy is 'Pretty in Pink' by the Psychedelic Furs, especially the intro.  Not sure why, but it never fails!

5.  I want to learn Greek but am feeling defeated before I've begun.  It looks so hard...

6.  I'm a bit of a perfectionist apart from when it comes to housework... 

7.  I got moshed at a gig for the first time aged 42.  Yes, it hurt and I didn't like it!


And now for the blogs I'm nominating:
I have to apologise if these blogs have received the award before as I'm a fairly new follower to some of them!

Catherine Breton at http://plumedansante.blogspot.com/.  Catherine blogs in French, but I'm all for a bit of variety and her blog is one of my favourites.

Rebecca Bradley at http://lifeinclarity.blogspot.com/.  Rebecca's blog is a great mix of writing stuff, book reviews and life.

Jenny at Fulfilling Dreams - an amusing and supportive blogger http://www.fulfilling-dreams.com/

Sarah Pearson at http://emptywhitepages.blogspot.com/.  A generously supportive blogger and an entertaining read.

http://kittiehoward.blogspot.com/ - Kittie Howard is new to me but her blog is easy on the eye and lots of fun.

http://nancysthompson.blogspot.com/ - another blog that's new to me but is well-written and Nancy's a very friendly blogger!

HOW AM I DOING?  I'VE NEARLY RUN OUT!

http://peggyeddleman.blogspot.com/  Peggy Eddleman is also new to me and I've been thoroughly enjoying her blogs and all the photos of mouthwatering cookies...

http://readywritego.blogspot.com/  Cherie Writes.  Another friendly and supportive blogger and her blog is really well put together - I wish I knew how to make mine look like that!

http://ashley-nixon.blogspot.com/  another blog I'm new to - have a look if you're not already a follower!

http://scribblesnjots.blogspot.com/  another supportive fellow-writer, Barbara Kloss

http://caitlin-lane.blogspot.com/  another new blog to me, but well-written and interesting to read!

And now for something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT...

http://islandofterror.blogspot.com/  I thought I'd go quirky for my last one.  Nothing to do with writing, a bit off the wall, but certainly entertaining!

That's all folks!  I don't know anyone else!

To Kindle or not to Kindle?

I have yet to invest in one of these new-fangled(ish) electronic reading devices.  The thing, is, I've never been able to decide whether they're a GOOD THING or a STEP IN THE WRONG DIRECTION!  

I know that Kindle is a boon in one way to us writers as we can now publish for Kindle in the absence of a 'paper' publishing contract, but I was wondering whether it's going to be the death of books as some suggest.  I certainly don't want to play a part in the death of books as I love everything about having a 'proper' copy of a book and then there's all the joy to be experienced in the process of lending it out and sharing the love.  Not quite the same with a Kindle.  And, of course, I do one day hope to have a novel out in paperback myself!

What do you think?  I know a lot of writers who have Kindles and I'm really tempted to put one on my Christmas list, especially as they're now £90. 
I have also been telling myself that you can't halt 'progress' and that millions will be buying Kindles even if I don't, so will it really make any difference?

I'd love to hear other people's thoughts on this subject!  (Please forgive me if I don't reply to your comment as Blogger has taken against me and won't let me comment on my own blog for some reason!)

Response to comments!

Blogger won't let me respond - something to do with cookies! So...

Thank you so much everyone for your encouraging words!
Catherine, I am touched that you have actually tracked down the magazine so you can read my story! I would have been happy to email you scanned copies from the magazine (and still would be.  I'm looking forward to the challenge of reading Le Secret des Roslands (sorry if that's not right) en francais!

Thanks to everyone for coming by - I will be seeking out your blogs if I haven't already and having a read!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!  :-)

Insecure Writer's Support Group

It's true, I have been feeling insecure lately.

Before going on holiday I submitted quite a few stories and came back to find that none of them had been accepted.

I then got up, brushed myself down and started writing some more only to have them rejected for various reasons (mostly to do with having received a lot of stories on that subject already etc).  Although it wasn't a direct dig at my ability, I still felt stupid for not noticing (I have been reading the mags for over a year so should be pretty 'up' on what's being covered!)

Determined not to give up, I have written some more and - finally- had one accepted today.  So, to be honest I'm not feeling as insecure as I was yesterday, but still...

I've got this novel to start.  The enormity of it is what's stopping me, I think.  I've had some great advice about just tackling a chapter at a time, which I intend to take, but I'm so afraid my story will peter-out and I'll be left feeling as though I didn't think it through and have written a load of mindless rubbish.

I'm not saying that's what I'm going to write, but my fear is that I will feel like that about it!  While it's just here in my head it's a lovely, atmospheric story... on paper it may be hollow trash.

I wouldn't normally wallow in defeat before I've even tried, but as this is the day for writing the Insecure Writer's Support Group blog, I feel it's ok!

Glad to have got all that off my chest, anyway!

Feeling the Flow!

~After a summer of having a head full of clouds, I'm starting to see the light again!
I'm pretty sure I've sent poor Clare at Woman's Weekly some fairly uninteresting and contrived stories during my 'cloud' period, so I won't be surprised or disappointed when they ping back to me.  The good news for me is that my mind has been freed from the clouds - strangely enough with a very low dose of HRT!  If I'd realised what the problem was, I'd have gone and sorted it out months ago!

So, my brain is once again as active as my fingers.  In fact, it's so active that I actually remembered that I have a blog and should put something on it once in a while!

While I'm here, can I please apologise to anyone who's left me comments that I haven't replied to?  Most of the time Blogger won't let me comment on my blog - I don't know why, but if anyone else does, please let me know!  Apparently I haven't got the right sort of account...???  So I message people where I can find a way to or try and comment on their blog if it will let me! 

I'm currently writing one last long-short story before settling down to write the first draft of my novel.  I'm hatching some plot ideas and character traits while I wait and think, so I'm not just putting it off, honest! 

Thanks for visiting!